Wednesday, 24 October 2012

I get tiredness and hunger confused.

I'm aware of it. But man it's a hard battle. ALL of me is wanting to eat and eat and eat. But I've been here before ... I'm so tired that food will never fill me up... It's sleep that I am craving.

So I'm not going to feed that craving with food. In gonna give it what it wants. Sleeeeeeep.

I ran today. The Wellington waterfront. Lucky aye.

Tuesday, 23 October 2012

This morning I put my shoes on and ran!!!

Keryn who I met through our running group sent me a text yesterday saying "lets do the park run".

So I did!!! 5 Ks. Who cares what the time was. I ran!!

Thank you SO much for all your wonderful, encouraging comments. Thank you. THANK YOU!!!

So this is what I've learnt. If you really have hit a wall... Take a break. Enjoy it. Then talk to other runners who are in the full flush of running, or read running blogs! and before you know it... You'll be putting on your shoes and running again.

And... The sun is shining.
Nicky and I went to a really nice party on Saturday night. A room FULL of wonderful women. Chatting. Clinking glasses. Gobbling decadent party food. My friend had invited all her friends for the first of the festive drinks.

I wondered that night if I could fill a room.

Probably not.

I'd love to say I could. Fill a room of many, many women. Buy honestly... I don't think I could.

Went for another run today.

I'm that woman again. Leaving the day in her dust.

Monday, 22 October 2012

Joy. Running. I love you again. So much so... That I'm gonna put my shoes on and run. Right now.

My belly is full of dinner and there's so much to do to get ready for the week. There's housework to do and its getting late and I'm tired.

But running... I love you.

Here I come.

Saturday, 20 October 2012

This morning I put my shoes on and ran!!!

Keryn who I met through our running group sent me a text yesterday saying "lets do the park run".

So I did!!! 5 Ks. Who cares what the time was. I ran!!

Thank you SO much for all your wonderful, encouraging comments. Thank you. THANK YOU!!!

So this is what I've learnt. If you really have hit a wall... Take a break. Enjoy it. Then talk to other runners who are in the full flush of running, or read running blogs! and before you know it... You'll be putting on your shoes and running again.

And... The sun is shining.

Thursday, 18 October 2012

For the last two weeks I've been struggling.  I haven't been coping at work.  Taking everything personally. Fuzzy head.  Tired.  So tired.  At home, I've been a lazy, ineffective mum.

For the last two weeks I haven't been for run.

Coincidence?

I know I need to run.  I want to run.  Why can't I just put my shoes on and run?

Tuesday, 9 October 2012

School Holidays.

Bickering. Fighting. Demanding.

I actually like hearing the boys get a good fight going. If I stifle it too much... They simply won't learn to fight for something. To find the words to get what they want. To know when to give in. Or to know when to give up.

There's been a lot of fighting.

But there has also been a lot of standing next to each other as brothers.

Brothers.

My two boys... Standing next to each other against the world.

Knowing innately that they belong. That they have a place.

Fight away boys. Cos I know you love each other.

Monday, 8 October 2012

You gotta plan.

You can't just say I'll run 3 times the week.

You HAVE to book it in.

Here is why...

You'll spend everyday saying "should I run today or should I run tomorrow?". And if you don't end up running that day you'll feel guilty... robbing yourself of that glorious rest day.

Plan the run days. So that you can enjoy the rest days. You deserve them.

Wednesday, 3 October 2012

My legs are tight as man.
I went to hot yoga tonight... And it is so pitiful how far I can stretch down and out.
My hamstrings feel like they're gonna ping.
And I know... Gulp... That it's the running. Well... Running and not stretching.
One of the girls at yoga told me that as soon as she stopped running ... Her yoga practise improved considerably. She can touch her forehead to the floor even.
We chatted about how hard running is and how tough it is etc etc and she loves not running now.

This really challenged me.

Why on earth do I run?

Cos it is really, really hard.

But it always comes down to this...

I run because I want to.

I want that feeling of tired bones... Not just a tired mind.
I want the feeling of that last km... Running my guts out to a smokin song.
I want that feeling of everything going quiet except my true voice that I only hear when I run.
I want the feeling of strength and the feeling of being resilient.

I run cos I'm greedy. I want all that. And a bag of chips.

How to start again...



Has it been a while? Maybe you started out with a hiss and a roar? Did you blitz three good runs in a row ... but then got busy or got tired .... and that was that?

Does it feel like you're not a runner any more?  Does it feel like you don't deserve the road? 

That's simply not true.  You just have to do a couple of things to get back out there again.

Firstly, give yourself a break ... forgive yourself.  And secondly, just put your running gear on.  You don't even need to go for a run.  Just put your gear on.  No expectations.  No hype. 

See what happens.

Let me know.

It's like pretty much everything in life. The bridges you think you burnt can always be rebuilt. Grace and forgiveness are good tools for a rebuild.








Monday, 1 October 2012

It never gets easier ... you just get better.

I've written a lot about how hard it can be ... and how for me every run starts tough.

Because the reality is ... running never gets easier ... BECAUSE you get better.

You WANT to go faster, go further, climb steeper hills.

It just happens that way.

So it never gets easier ... you just get better.